Essence

Every relationship in a human life is important. It takes years to nurture any kind of relation, whether its friendship, relation with parents, relation with colleagues etc. I guess that is the time where the word ‘essence’ comes into meaning… Its very important to feel that ‘essence’ in the relation, to feel the love and affection (showed in any manner), to be able to cherish all through our life…

Our life gets its colours, because of the people around us. They help us develop as a person, as a friend, as an advisor and many such roles we like to take in our lives. It’s a fortune to live with people who understand you the most. They understand every bit of you, your happiness, your sadness, and any kind of mood that you are in… They just brighten your existence that makes you realize that you have always someone watching your back. There had been many instances when a person is at the lowest emotional phases of life, when a person realizes the significance of any relation that comes across their life. Ok that’s to much of gyaaan (as my friend says) for a blog. I think it would be better to talk more about real time experiences in our life…

There had been many times when I felt very disappointed about what I am doing with my life. This often lead to a lot of frustration and anger for silly incidences. Whenever I went back to my room, often I used to try avoiding talking to my roommates. But the way they touch my life, every time I go back to the room with such a mood is amazing. The care and concern for getting to know what is haunting my thoughts and reacting according to the situation is just amazing. There are many instances we get angry with the people we live with, but at the end of the day, they always bring a smile on your face by just trying to relax you and joking around. Small acts and enquires everyday just touch your life every time… We all reach our house at different time, but still we try to have dinner together every single day. Any good news, big or small is celebrated. This “essence” of a relationship is so important to be preserved in our life. If we can live with people who always this so called “essence” in our life it is one of the most gifted thing a person can get in life.

The relation with an elder brother (since I have only an elder brother), is one of the strangest and the best relationship. As my elder brother, he has always watched my back incase of any problem or incident of my life.. Although we fight a lot, even if we meet for the shortest time duration J. However, there is still a good feeling in that, as I know he always understands my insensibilities, immaturity etc. I remember the first time I met with an accident I was numb, I did not know what to do, all I could do was call him, he came there and just stood like a wall, with no one in the crowd even trying to use a bad word to me. Directly and indirectly, he always touched my life. Helped me every moment whether it was about my studies, my work life, my first relationship, my finances… everything that affected my life…. As a young boy I never understood the “essence” of this relation, but today as I look back (not that I have become very old now, its just a way of expressing of happiness for completing silver jubilee of life), I realize all he said and did was always for my betterment and well being. I remember when we had to practice for singing on the stage, as a good musician he used always correct me, and as a restless and non accepting younger brother I used to oppose every correction. Finally father would have to stand there as a referee. An elder brother who supports you and guides you at every point is truly the best that a person can have….
I remember an incident in my office. A close friend of mine in office happens to be an elder brother. As a person, he is very caring person, so I can imagine how caring he would be as an elder brother. From day to day conversations, I realized how much he cares for his brother. In a tragic accident he lost his brother, I went to his place to try to help him arrange his travel to his native place, it was so hard to see him. I could never imagine the person I knew breaking down like this. After a few days he came back with his complete family trying to support them cope up with this tragic incident. The pain in his eyes was enough to express his grief. He continues to support the family the best way he can, and I admire him for that. The love for the brother, the family was something, which was very very heartening. One day he had a request to make, it was one of the most heart touching moments in my life. He wanted to take a big size picture print of a collage photograph made by his brother before he expired…. When I got the picture printed in my hand, I had a very heavy heart accepting it…. Next day as I handed over to my friend’s hand, the look on his face just said so much…. I can never forget that… The amount of love and affection that just reflected out of his face while looking at the picture just moved me…….. The “essence” as I say of a relationship is expressed in many ways, it is for us to realize its value and be able to cherish it….

There are many events in our life that just break us down. Many people in our life just make get us out of everything, and any incident seems small…. Some of them do it directly and some do it indirectly, without realizing that are actually bringing us out of our bad state….. A very close friend of mine, whom I call the “king of sarcasm” is such a support to me, he just has a real picture to my cynicism and my so called perceived problems, that it really helps me analyze every problem and look it with a better point of view….. Ok now the next person, he is elder to me (same age as my elder brother) but I call him “chotu”, I fight him as I do with my elder brother, but anytime I am into something bad, he is one of the few persons who has the patience to listen to all my bad temper and still react coolly or fight again on the same topic, as a result I actually forget what went wrong earlier….. Some people come into life and stay with us through every situation, and you really feel protected, as you know that anytime, any moment you can just fall back on them and seek their support…. My previous roommates were like that…. All of them very cheerful, they just brought a smile on my face, had a solution to every problem, and most importantly they knew my strengths and weaknesses, always stood at the weak times to just support unconditionally…. After we moved out to different places, I always had a fear if this bond would break, but my fear was irrelevant…. That bond still continues, anytime I need their support, they are just there like Rocks supporting every time….. Some people just know you too well, that even your silence or a single text message tells them how you are doing….. Like an incident that happened the other day, I was on the so called “silent mode” for few days, trying to figure out the “noodle type” confusion in my life, future and some bad incidents… She just messaged if we could meet over coffee, I readily agreed as I really wanted a change. When I met her, talked to her for a long time, and ended up telling her all the “noodles” , it was so relieving that everything seemed to be brighter , as she showed so much interest to hear out what was there in my mind…. As we came out I just thanked her, and asked her how she knew that I had these “noodles” in my mind, she had a very simple answer to tell me, it is intuition.... That was something, which was so fantastic…. Some bonds in life just make you feel special…. Many people in life like this who stand by like I mentioned till now are people who frame a part of your life…The “essence” of these wonderful bonds should be kept with utmost love and affection…..

One of the most beautiful relations in our life is with our parents…. As a child, I was very scared of my father, as all children I wanted buy everything I see while we went out for shopping and cold shoulder lot of things, which I did not like, but my dad always kept a balance between strictness and sweetness. Although I always felt he was strict with both of us. My mother as always was the moderator to get us all we like… Of course at times, she did support our father where she felt it was unnecessary for us to demand…. As parents, they never forced my brother and me to study rigorously every time…. They always gave us a free hand in doing anything we liked to do, whether its music, sports, or anything other than studying….. I really hated studying…. Then came a time when I had to leave to the hostel suddenly, that was one of the most difficult time initially… Although I was very comfortable after a week, thanks to my uncle, aunt and cous….. When I went back for the first holiday, there was huge change in my father’s attitude…. He had become so soft and caring, took care of the smallest detail related to our stay at home… Parents would go shopping a week before we reached home for holidays and buy everything we always liked from our childhood…. My parents supported every decision my brother and I took in our lives, and guided us through our worst times without any sign of tension in their eyes…. Until today, both of them keep track of every minute details of our life, but always give a free hand to do things the way we like... As a child I could never imagine how my father could change so much and express his love and affection in such a beautiful way. My mother is one support system in my life, who has always managed to just get me out of my mist difficult times…. She supports us ( I mean my father, brother and me) with such love and confidence in our decision, that it makes us see life with its best colours. Parents are the one of the most essential parts of our support system that make our life the most beautiful.

I could write on and on…, but all I intended to tell was, our complete life is a composition of all the wonderful relations and bonds we share in our life….. We should realize the “essence” of each relation, give it utmost are and cherish it…..

Gosh!!!!! As a good friend always tells, its too much of Gyaann for a topic…..

Love- A good feeling or a lesson???

In life, it is very important to have a partner. In school, it may appear very childish, we often classify a liking towards the other person as an infatuation, a crush etc. As we proceed to our college life, for some it is a status symbol to have a girlfriend / boyfriend and claim to have inseparable love towards each other, for some it’s a search for a ‘special’ person in life, with whom they would like to live their life ahead. The search for the ‘special’ person in life does not have to start necessarily at our college time, it can happen to us anywhere, may be way back at school, college life, working life… All of us, somewhere realize that we need a partner in our life, we need to be loved, someone to share our most intimate feelings, we need the ‘special’ person to make a difference in our life, someone to fall back upon at our bad times, someone ‘special’ for whom you would always want to go back home…. These are just feelings which a person experiences when he / she is in love……

Love is one of the most beautiful feelings which person can experience in life…. Thinking of your partner brings a smile on your face, makes you care for the person at any situation she undergoes, when one message on the phone makes your day, the day is incomplete without talking to her. You cannot just keep your phone down without talking to her for hours, you can fall back at her at any situation in life, the time spent with her always seems to be short. Love changes our life, into one of the most beautiful feeling God has created… For every important decision in life, you would want her share of decision also, wishing that at the end of the day we lived happily with our loving partner. You wish that you had met her a little earlier in life, in order to spend more time with her… The feeling of ‘love’ is so strong that it motivates you to make her yours in life, overcoming any amount of problems, which you encounter in your journey of life… You are ready to take any challenge in life, whether its studying hard ahead for your future, convincing parents for accepting your loved one in your family etc.. It makes a person strong, more responsible and dedicated, in order to make your life complete along with your partner. At the end of the day, a smile on her face, just melts you down, compelling you to forget any problem/ bad situation in life… The smile on her face just makes your life worth living…..

In a coin, there are two sides, the same is with love, there is a good side, and there is a adverse side also. When your loved one leaves you, there is a kind of zeroed feeling that happens in your heart. Life seems to stop for a while; there is always a hope in mind that you could get back with the person you loved. Then it is somehow a run to correct all the mistakes you had realized you did in the relationship. This teaches you a lot, as to how you could improve a relationship, love your partner, and care for her. However, when you realize that you can never get her back, life just seems to loose worth living. You fail to see the colors of life, the hope just dies down. You get scared to get into any kind of relationship, the fear of failure just haunts you now and then… It takes years to resurrect to where you were before the relationship happened to you. Sometimes it happens fast, but in some cases it may take time, may be even 2 years to resurrect to what you were… however, it varies to each individual… However, once you get back to life, these lessons just help you go ahead well in your life… There are times when your heart feels lonely, but still there remains a hope that someday , somewhere you will find your someone ‘special’ in life.. It is those feelings that keeps you going and enjoy the most wonderful feeling of love… The lessons that you learnt earlier help you to protect the relationship in the best possible way… You understand the sensitivity of any situation, which you may not have realized in the earlier relation. However, you still have insecurity somewhere within yourself, which makes you give you’re everything to nurture the relationship, to love the person, to care for her, to bring that one smile on her face that just makes your life worth living….

Love is a wonderful feeling, which needs to be preserved and enjoyed every moment…. The lessons help you nurture your relationship in the best way in order to make love the most beautiful feeling…..

ThE BiG SiZe EvEnT-- LIFE

Sometimes life seems to be very very difficult. I used to wonder at times that how difficult life is, the problems never seem to be ending, relations never seem to build up with utmost satisfaction, the person you like and love never seemed to trust you, your friends seem to be doubtful about your relation….although with one of the best jobs in hand, still not contented with it…..

You give your 100% for everything you want in life….. When in college as a dedicated student, the person just dedicates his/her time and energy to get the maximum marks out of all the hard work that he /she put in… to just realize that may be it was not enough, as some people are just born smart or had a very systematic approach to studies right from childhood, while at that time the other person was busy carving his life to be an all –rounder with a good performance on sports, music and studies sometimes….. Anyway you get the ultimate happiness when all the hardwork in school and college shows up in your work life.. People know you and respect you for who you are, not only for the academics in college…. The BIG event called life always has something to look forward in life, may be at times the person felt, why the hell should I work so hard, to ultimately land up in low paying / unsatisfying job, but he/ she should always remember, LIFE does not end at a particular time, it just takes off from every moment you think the time has stopped…..

In personal life, I always wondered, why the person he/she loves does not trust the partner, is it a search for a new partner or due to a high dissatisfaction level the relationship or is it the nature of the partner or lack of trust on the partner… I never got an answer to this question.. its still an unanswered question…. The impact on the other person is very adverse, he/she looses the confidence and trust in any relation… It’s the fear of breaking a relationship that refrains the person to ever get into any kind of relation whether its love, friendship etc… There are some situations in your life when your close friends fail to understand your problems, situations in which they never seem to trust you… Instances when your close friends fight, and you try to work hard to keep both of them and encourage them to get back, only to realize that may be you may be forgotten later. Its such situations in life that make you weak, feeble and helpless….. Again this event called LIFE has always taught you how to be strong, aggressive ad look forward to the best times which are left in life…. Relations have to be treated with utmost care and hard work….. These are the things which make our life worth living….. At the end of the day, there are so many events in life which we have to look forward for, instances when your best friend needs you to be there in phases of his/her problems, happiness etc., when you start liking someone hoping that some day you will get the love of your life, when your presence brings a smile on a few faces , even though its only one. These are some instances , EVENTS which make a LIFE A BIG EVENT…… Its really a event of happiness, which we should enjoy, cherish and look forward to each and every moment…